Things...

Clouds pass everyday.
But we notice not.
Some stay awhile and shower on us.
Some cover up the sun for us.
Some just drift away.
It happens around us,
and we never remember those clouds..

In my sky, there are no passing clouds.
They always stay. Always.
That's probably why I never see the sun.
Not that I'm complaining.
I cherish my clouds. Forever I will.
Only at times like this I realize
that it's good to see the sun once in a while.

I'm like one of them clouds in your sky.
Now I think I should have just drifted away
when I'd done with the showers.
But I like to stay, when I like the sky or what's underneath.
What I saw below; floating on your sky;
made me stop, and stay.
I saw the most beautiful rose I had ever showered on.

The rose most vulnerable in the sun.
Thorns all around the stem,
The cunning bees buzzing all over.
I thought perhaps I was sent to protect; mad thought.
After all I had seen and been through.
I still thought I should look after you.
From the sun, the thorns and the bees.

Had I realized that you needed the sun;
I wouldn't have stood there.
Taking those angry hot glares .
Had I realized that you grew the thorns to save yourself.
I wouldn't  have worried about it endlessly.
Had I realized that the bees cannot harm but steal the honey.
I wouldn't have dropped those spells to chase them away.

There was no intention. First time it was.
I failed to think; with my senses and not the heart.
Insanity at the worse:  trying to block the sun from getting at you?
Closing in on you:  to remove the thorns?
Thundering and pouring down:  to annihilate the bees?
Yes it is true; I failed to think.
About anything else.

Failed, to see that you had the strength.
Forgot to remember that,
You were fine on your own before I entered your sky.
To understand that, you knew
not just to survive, but to have a life as well.
Blind I was, and a failure,
failure as a friend.

Enough said and none done, yet.
I apologize one last time.
For all that's happened.
If and when, you ever decipher this.
I would be long gone.
Trust me one last time.
I've already started drifting away - from your sky.

The search...

Where is life...

Soulless is when one's dead;
No breathing in, No breathing out.
No regrets is of use then.
Being soulless cause no pain.

Mind, it just goes away.
Soulless body has no mind.
It might feel pain;
It cannot be hurt.

Lifeless; a never thought truth.
Breathing in and breathing out,
Its all so hurt,
With regrets all left with it.

Where would it go?,
With no life but a mind to look after.
It might feel no pain,
But it does get hurt.

Poor mortal body,
With life lost and mind heavy.
Drifts with the thoughts,
Towards a destination unknown.

Heavy mind's love to live
Adds flame to the fire.
Numb and weak are the thoughts
As it continues to search life.

Search for life,
Is what I do with time.
I don't live with this body
I exist; I search life.

Expectations; can't recall the meaning.
Have not expected in a while..
I just move, I don't wish to hope,
But I search life. Can't stop it, I just do it.

Where is my life....

is there another hell?

This is not to win you back,

Or to ask for a second chance.

I know I was wrong,

I know that I broke the trust.

But this is certainly not an apology.

This is just me, talking,

like every other time; just talking.

This no plea for forgiveness

I know I don't deserve one.

and I hate myself for letting you down anyway.

I say that I'm strong,

but everytime I see you;

it kills me.

is it guilt or is it shame?

Or is it just love and respect confronting ?

it's not just hard; it's painful.

way too painful than I had imagined.

I thought I'd never understand hell.

I guess I do now.

Everytime you pass me on trying to avoid my eyes;

it crushes the heart out of my chest.

This is got to be hell.

The silence, the unspoken anger,

and the way you try to ignore me...

Makes me feel like disappearing.

The only light is that it can't go any worse.

or could it?

could there be another hell worse than this?

is there really another hell??

The last day

My mind's empty, there's no memories and there's no pain to feel
I'm a big boy, I'll get over it
I've been there before...

I had known that this would happen all along
but I never figured out how much would it hurt.
Its time now, lets say it
how hard it can be to say goodbye goodbye

If today's the last day, that you'd ever wanna see my face
Leave me with a smile in your face
Coz I don't remember yesterday
and there's no history to brag about

If today's the last day that I'd ever see your face
close your eyes and walk away
Coz I don't want you see me broken
I'm much stronger than you think

If what we have's the last day
I dread seeing tomorrow
Not that I can't move along
But I hate doing it this time...


It's about time; lets just say it
Your eyes, your smile the way you make things happen
would be my first memory of tomorrow

So turn around and just say it
Coz I don't want tears in my mind
It's just goodbye... goodbye..

One of those times...

I go away,

and I decide not to look back ever.

I hideout,

but I keep stalking you.

I'm lost,

and I try not to look for.

For I know,

where I would find me.

And I don't want you to know;

that I'm in you.


There's a million things I wanna tell you,

and there's a million ways to do that.

But I don't wanna tell you that,

sometimes, you make me really crazy;

and this is one of those times...


There's a million girls out there,

and there's a million ways to get them.

But you're the only girl;

I never tried to impress

For I know, I can never lie to you!


It's all the same since the day we met.

And I just don't remember anything before that.

Nothing has changed until now, but,

sometimes you really make me crazy,

and, this, is one of those times.


You've got a weird taste,

and a powerful mind.

You chose the downtown thug,

and you made him blabber all of this..

Girl this is one of those vain attempts,

to really stay away from you.

Because you really make me crazy

and this is one of those times...